Teary, several years too early

This morning was "Graduation Sunday" at our church, a day for honoring those graduating from high school or college.  I actually got tears in my eyes.  I don't know any of the graduates particularly well, so I can't pretend I was crying for them.  I was crying at the realization that we are inching toward that time with Brishen.  I cannot imagine our family without the giant manly balance he provides as a contrast to all the littleness around.  He gets the kids wild ALL THE TIME.  He talks my ear off ALL THE TIME.  Every bit of it is welcome because I know that these three years will fly.

He has taken his last class as a Freshman and only has finals to complete before he can call himself a Sophomore.  I cannot imagine how much our life will change when he goes to college, and I don't like the thought of it one bit.  Oh, how his little siblings love him and will be lost without him.  I, too, will be lost and lonely.  Basia will feel abandoned.

Who will tell me all the ways that life mimics Calvin and Hobbes?  Who will keep me informed of world events?  Who will lay on the couch to let everyone jump on and off of him?  Who will reach the things on high shelves and change light bulbs without a ladder (I can promise you that I am not growing any more tall ones in this family!).    Who will remember the rules to all the board games we own?  Who will be the sanity in a house full of not-yet-rational beings?

I had been hoping the next year would pass pretty quickly so we can see all our current foster cases through to completion and get on to a more sane and "normal" life.  Now I realize that I don't want even a day to go by too quickly.  I will be the world's biggest wreck of a mom when it's my turn to see my son's face on the screen as a high school graduate.  Stay away, 2017!